1 00:00:06,817 --> 00:00:08,551 Of different things. 2 00:00:08,552 --> 00:00:10,786 Now some people are afraid of spiders, 3 00:00:10,787 --> 00:00:12,555 Some are afraid of flying, 4 00:00:12,556 --> 00:00:14,924 Others death. But at our house... 5 00:00:14,925 --> 00:00:16,959 I have to kick a ball! 6 00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:19,295 Okay, the kickball unit in gym 7 00:00:19,296 --> 00:00:21,364 Isn't one of your classic fears, 8 00:00:21,365 --> 00:00:25,201 But in brick's case, it was justified. Well, we already said you had mono 9 00:00:25,202 --> 00:00:28,938 During your lacrosse unit, and we played the swine flu card 10 00:00:28,939 --> 00:00:30,640 To get you out of presidential fitness testing. 11 00:00:30,641 --> 00:00:33,409 I think you're gonna have to face your fears 12 00:00:33,410 --> 00:00:34,877 On this one, brick. 13 00:00:34,878 --> 00:00:37,413 Everyone's gonna laugh at me... (whispers) laugh at me. 14 00:00:37,414 --> 00:00:40,850 Okay, buddy. Grab a ball. I'm gonna show you how it's done. 15 00:00:40,851 --> 00:00:43,719 Um, mike, do you think that's such a good idea? 16 00:00:43,720 --> 00:00:46,822 Maybe I should do it. All he's gotta do is raise his foot. 17 00:00:46,823 --> 00:00:50,092 I saw a donkey do it on the news. How hard can it be? 18 00:00:53,797 --> 00:00:56,732 Big, fat waste of time. 19 00:00:56,733 --> 00:01:00,236 While mike was unwinding with a beer in the shower, 20 00:01:00,237 --> 00:01:02,238 I was gonna teach brick to kick a ball 21 00:01:02,239 --> 00:01:04,941 As only a mother can. 22 00:01:04,942 --> 00:01:07,543 I got candy. Okay, brick? We're kicking for candy. 23 00:01:11,481 --> 00:01:12,915 Ohh... All right, well, 24 00:01:12,916 --> 00:01:15,217 You kicked your own leg by mistake. 25 00:01:15,218 --> 00:01:17,520 I'm sorry. 26 00:01:17,521 --> 00:01:19,422 Don't be sorry. It's all about timing. 27 00:01:19,423 --> 00:01:22,158 Let me show you. Roll me the ball. 28 00:01:22,159 --> 00:01:24,026 (thump) 29 00:01:24,027 --> 00:01:25,861 Whoo-hoo! Nice kick, mom. 30 00:01:25,862 --> 00:01:27,763 Did you see that ball-- 31 00:01:32,803 --> 00:01:34,470 H. 32 00:01:34,471 --> 00:01:36,072 That's that, then. 33 00:01:36,073 --> 00:01:37,573 Oh, well. 34 00:01:37,574 --> 00:01:40,376 You may wonder why we didn't get the ball. 35 00:01:40,377 --> 00:01:42,345 Because there wano way 36 00:01:42,346 --> 00:01:44,180 We were stepping foot in that yard. 37 00:01:44,181 --> 00:01:46,315 Every neighborhood has one- you know, 38 00:01:46,316 --> 00:01:48,284 A family that's just not worth tangling with. 39 00:01:48,285 --> 00:01:50,286 Well, in our neighborhood, it was... 40 00:01:50,287 --> 00:01:52,154 (clank) whoo! Yeah! 41 00:01:52,155 --> 00:01:54,156 The glossners-- four unruly hooligans 42 00:01:54,157 --> 00:01:56,926 Who'd held our street hostage for as long as I can remember. 43 00:01:56,927 --> 00:01:59,628 (clanking) 44 00:01:59,629 --> 00:02:02,164 Whatever hell they rained on you, you took it, 45 00:02:02,165 --> 00:02:05,801 'cause retaliating only made it worse. 46 00:02:05,802 --> 00:02:08,337 But as bad as those glossner boys were... 47 00:02:08,338 --> 00:02:10,740 Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey! You put--get--y-you-- 48 00:02:10,741 --> 00:02:13,676 It was the mom you really didn't want to mess with. (sighs) 49 00:02:13,677 --> 00:02:16,078 Is there a problem here? 50 00:02:18,982 --> 00:02:20,883 Yeah, there's a problem. 51 00:02:20,884 --> 00:02:22,885 That amazon scares the hell out of me. 52 00:02:22,886 --> 00:02:25,287 No, no. We're good. 53 00:02:25,288 --> 00:02:27,857 All right then. 54 00:02:29,893 --> 00:02:31,761 Hey, uh, that's mine. 55 00:02:31,762 --> 00:02:33,662 Really? 56 00:02:33,663 --> 00:02:36,198 It was right here on the curb. 57 00:02:36,199 --> 00:02:38,834 You own the whole outdoors, do you, princess? 58 00:02:40,303 --> 00:02:41,704 No. (laughs) 59 00:02:41,705 --> 00:02:43,139 Of course not. I-- 60 00:02:43,140 --> 00:02:45,541 You have a nice day. 61 00:02:49,980 --> 00:02:51,881 (can clatters) 62 00:02:54,317 --> 00:02:56,185 (mike) wow, that was quick. 63 00:02:56,186 --> 00:02:58,154 Ball went into the glossners' yard. 64 00:02:58,155 --> 00:03:00,623 Oh, well. What are you gonna do? 65 00:03:04,327 --> 00:03:06,262 It's so lame around here. There's nothing on tv. 66 00:03:06,263 --> 00:03:09,432 Thers nothing to do. Here's something. Take your brother out 67 00:03:09,433 --> 00:03:13,302 And teach him how to kick this. Can't. Book report. 68 00:03:13,303 --> 00:03:16,305 Well, then turn off the tv and get on it. 69 00:03:16,306 --> 00:03:18,574 Fine, I'll teach him! Whatever. Get off me. God! 70 00:03:18,575 --> 00:03:20,976 (dog barks and snarls) (gasps) 71 00:03:20,977 --> 00:03:23,913 Sure you okay? (panting) the glossners' dog-- it's loose! 72 00:03:23,914 --> 00:03:26,816 It tried to chase me home. I lost a shoe! 73 00:03:26,817 --> 00:03:29,552 Oh, god! Now it has my scent. 74 00:03:29,553 --> 00:03:31,554 Oh, no. The glossners' dog? 75 00:03:31,555 --> 00:03:32,888 We should do something. 76 00:03:32,889 --> 00:03:34,990 We really should. 77 00:03:34,991 --> 00:03:39,061 For days, that dog was out terrorizing the neighborhood. 78 00:03:39,062 --> 00:03:40,696 (dog barks and snarl 79 00:03:40,697 --> 00:03:42,064 We should do something. 80 00:03:42,065 --> 00:03:43,466 We really should. 81 00:03:43,467 --> 00:03:46,535 (dog barking and snarling in distance) 82 00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:52,408 (brakes squeal) 83 00:04:01,518 --> 00:04:02,985 We should do something. 84 00:04:02,986 --> 00:04:04,520 We really should. 85 00:04:04,521 --> 00:04:06,856 I hate those stupid glossners. 86 00:04:06,857 --> 00:04:09,024 Why are we letting them run the neighborhood? 87 00:04:09,025 --> 00:04:11,393 Can't you just go over there 88 00:04:11,394 --> 00:04:13,229 And demand that they chain up that nasty dog? 89 00:04:13,230 --> 00:04:15,231 No, honey, I can't. For better or for worse, 90 00:04:15,232 --> 00:04:17,233 They're our neighbors, and once you start 91 00:04:17,234 --> 00:04:19,101 Battling with neighbors, it never ends well-- 92 00:04:19,102 --> 00:04:20,536 Especially the glossners. 93 00:04:20,537 --> 00:04:23,472 You know that house on the corner that burned down? 94 00:04:23,473 --> 00:04:25,441 Oh, christmas tree fire? Mnh-mnh. 95 00:04:25,442 --> 00:04:28,277 Trust me, it is better just to ep the peace. 96 00:04:28,278 --> 00:04:30,279 (inhales deeply) 97 00:04:32,883 --> 00:04:34,850 (bell rings) 98 00:04:34,851 --> 00:04:36,519 (door slams) 99 00:04:36,520 --> 00:04:38,087 Glossners. 100 00:04:38,088 --> 00:04:39,555 We'd better go. 101 00:04:39,556 --> 00:04:42,057 And then sue, whose sense of justice 102 00:04:42,058 --> 00:04:44,460 Is inexplicably greater than her sense of fear, 103 00:04:44,461 --> 00:04:47,530 Decided to take matters into her own hands. 104 00:04:47,531 --> 00:04:49,365 I'm gonna talk to them. 105 00:04:49,366 --> 00:04:51,767 Sue! 106 00:04:53,136 --> 00:04:55,604 (exhales deeply) 107 00:04:55,605 --> 00:04:58,641 Um, excuse me. 108 00:04:58,642 --> 00:05:02,077 I... Wanted to bring to your attention 109 00:05:02,078 --> 00:05:06,015 That your dog I-is kind of running loose. 110 00:05:06,016 --> 00:05:09,051 And it ate my shoe. 111 00:05:09,052 --> 00:05:11,620 Who are you? 112 00:05:11,621 --> 00:05:13,956 Sue. 113 00:05:13,957 --> 00:05:18,027 Sue heck. I live down the street. 114 00:05:18,028 --> 00:05:20,462 Anyway, you might want to chain up your dog. 115 00:05:20,463 --> 00:05:23,065 (thud) (laughs) 116 00:05:23,066 --> 00:05:25,234 What was that for? For being stupid. 117 00:05:25,235 --> 00:05:27,903 You're stupid. You wanna do somethin' about it? 118 00:05:27,904 --> 00:05:30,072 Okay. How about a fight? 119 00:05:30,073 --> 00:05:32,975 Yeah. Yeah, we'll totally fight you. 120 00:05:32,976 --> 00:05:36,245 After school, your house-- be there. 121 00:05:36,246 --> 00:05:38,380 Oh, I'll be there. 122 00:05:38,381 --> 00:05:40,349 I live there. 123 00:05:40,350 --> 00:05:43,118 I have no after-school activities. 124 00:05:52,933 --> 00:05:54,334 You're supposed to teach me kickball. 125 00:05:54,335 --> 00:05:57,204 Yeah, not happening. Where is the extension cord? 126 00:05:57,205 --> 00:05:59,773 How should I know? What are you losers doing? 127 00:05:59,774 --> 00:06:01,975 Oh, none of your beeswax, axl. 128 00:06:01,976 --> 00:06:03,610 Ouch. 129 00:06:03,611 --> 00:06:05,946 Ugh. Can you even read that yawn-fest? 130 00:06:05,947 --> 00:06:08,849 I love "moby dick." I read it last year. 131 00:06:08,850 --> 00:06:10,250 It's an allegory. 132 00:06:10,251 --> 00:06:12,519 If you say so. Hey! 133 00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:14,321 I guess I could teach you 134 00:06:14,322 --> 00:06:16,390 To kick a ball, but you gotta write 135 00:06:16,391 --> 00:06:18,826 A 20-page report on "moby dick" for me. Okay. 136 00:06:18,827 --> 00:06:20,527 And clean our room. When do we start? 137 00:06:20,528 --> 00:06:22,062 (thump) (sue) ow! 138 00:06:22,063 --> 00:06:24,865 That's pretty much it. So when you do my report, 139 00:06:24,866 --> 00:06:26,900 Put in that allegory thing, whatever. 140 00:06:26,901 --> 00:06:29,102 Teachers eat that stuff up. 141 00:06:36,277 --> 00:06:38,545 I'm surprised you showed up. 142 00:06:38,546 --> 00:06:41,815 I'm surprised you showed up. Good one. 143 00:06:41,816 --> 00:06:43,283 Let's do this. 144 00:06:43,284 --> 00:06:45,185 Ld on just one sec. 145 00:06:49,657 --> 00:06:51,758 What are you doing? 146 00:06:51,759 --> 00:06:54,094 We're fighting. 147 00:06:56,331 --> 00:07:01,034 (carl douglas) ¶ oh, ho-ho, ho ¶ 148 00:07:01,035 --> 00:07:08,208 ¶ oh, ho-ho, ho ¶ 149 00:07:08,209 --> 00:07:13,146 ¶ oh, ho-ho, ho ¶ 150 00:07:13,147 --> 00:07:16,817 ¶ everybody was kung fu fighting ¶ 151 00:07:16,818 --> 00:07:21,688 ¶ huah! ¶ ¶ those cats were fast as lightning ¶ 152 00:07:21,689 --> 00:07:25,893 ¶ hah! ¶ ¶ in fact, it was a little bit frightening ¶ 153 00:07:25,894 --> 00:07:30,030 ¶ huah! ¶ ¶ but they did it with expert timing ¶ 154 00:07:30,031 --> 00:07:32,199 ¶ hah! ¶ ¶ oh, yeah ¶ 155 00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:35,302 (thud) ¶ oh, ho-ho, ho ¶ 156 00:07:35,303 --> 00:07:36,770 ¶ hah! ¶ 157 00:07:36,771 --> 00:07:39,673 ¶ oh, ho-ho, ho ¶ 158 00:07:39,674 --> 00:07:41,208 ¶ hah! ¶ 159 00:07:41,209 --> 00:07:44,578 ¶ oh, ho-ho, ho... ¶ 160 00:07:44,579 --> 00:07:46,847 The glossners stole our boom box. 161 00:07:46,848 --> 00:07:48,448 (clicks tongue) oh, well. 162 00:07:48,449 --> 00:07:50,517 We have too many possessions, anyway. 163 00:07:50,518 --> 00:07:53,954 We're trying to simplify. I tried talking to them about their dog, 164 00:07:53,955 --> 00:07:56,823 And then carly and I got into this fight with them. 165 00:07:56,824 --> 00:07:59,092 Wait. You got into a fight? 166 00:07:59,093 --> 00:08:01,428 Yeah, we had this whole routine planned and everything-- 167 00:08:01,429 --> 00:08:03,697 Routine? What do you mean, routine? 168 00:08:03,698 --> 00:08:05,899 Yeah, well, we worked out some choreography and-- 169 00:08:05,900 --> 00:08:08,802 Hang on. Choreography? For a fight? 170 00:08:08,803 --> 00:08:10,837 Yeah. That's what the boom box was for. 171 00:08:10,838 --> 00:08:12,873 We played "kung fu fighting." 172 00:08:12,874 --> 00:08:15,075 You do know what a fight is, don't ya? 173 00:08:15,076 --> 00:08:17,077 Of course. And they didn't even 174 00:08:17,078 --> 00:08:19,079 Let us get to the synchronized cartwheels. 175 00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:21,415 We worked really hard on it, too. 176 00:08:21,416 --> 00:08:22,849 Pfft! 177 00:08:22,850 --> 00:08:24,885 (sighs) 178 00:08:24,886 --> 00:08:26,353 Oh, my god. 179 00:08:26,354 --> 00:08:29,356 You know, it's time to take a stand. 180 00:08:29,357 --> 00:08:31,291 Here's what we're gonna do. I'm gonna write 181 00:08:31,292 --> 00:08:33,327 An anonymous letter to the police, 182 00:08:33,328 --> 00:08:35,228 Telling them about the dog. 183 00:08:35,229 --> 00:08:37,331 Then I'll drive to lafayette under cloak of darkness 184 00:08:37,332 --> 00:08:39,166 And mail it when nobody is looking 185 00:08:39,167 --> 00:08:41,068 So the stamp can't be traced to us. 186 00:08:41,069 --> 00:08:42,936 And I'll seal the envelope with a sponge, 187 00:08:42,937 --> 00:08:45,372 So they can't I.D. Us by our saliva. 188 00:08:45,373 --> 00:08:48,075 Or I could go over and talk to 'em. 189 00:08:48,076 --> 00:08:51,411 That's crazy. We have a good life here, mike. 190 00:08:51,412 --> 00:08:53,814 I don't want to move. I'm not gonna sit around 191 00:08:53,815 --> 00:08:55,816 And let our daughter fight our fights. 192 00:08:55,817 --> 00:08:57,551 What kind of example are we setting? 193 00:08:57,552 --> 00:08:59,453 It's humiliating, even more than the... 194 00:08:59,454 --> 00:09:01,488 You know, fighting to music. 195 00:09:01,489 --> 00:09:03,457 (exhales deeply) 196 00:09:13,234 --> 00:09:14,868 Yeah? 197 00:09:14,869 --> 00:09:16,236 Uh... 198 00:09:16,237 --> 00:09:18,305 Hi. I'm, uh, mike heck, from down--down the street. 199 00:09:18,306 --> 00:09:20,807 I wanted to talk to you about your boys. 200 00:09:20,808 --> 00:09:23,143 What about 'em? 201 00:09:23,144 --> 00:09:24,878 Do you wanna... Maybe put something on? 202 00:09:24,879 --> 00:09:27,614 I can wait. It's a little bit chilly. 203 00:09:27,615 --> 00:09:31,318 It's okay. I run hot. Look, my boys are good boys. 204 00:09:31,319 --> 00:09:33,320 Really? Well, your sons challenged my daughter 205 00:09:33,321 --> 00:09:35,890 To a fight and then they stole her boom box. 206 00:09:35,891 --> 00:09:39,560 Why would there be a boom box if they was fighting? You know--I guess there was some choreography, 207 00:09:39,561 --> 00:09:41,562 And--you know what? That's not the point. 208 00:09:41,563 --> 00:09:43,464 The point is that my daughter simply asked them 209 00:09:43,465 --> 00:09:45,433 To control their dog, and then-- 210 00:09:45,434 --> 00:09:48,269 Or... Maybe your girl's got a crush on my rodney. 211 00:09:48,270 --> 00:09:51,239 And when he told her he didn't like her back, 212 00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:52,274 She decided to get revenge. 213 00:09:52,275 --> 00:09:54,543 Happens to us all the time. We're charismatic. 214 00:09:54,544 --> 00:09:55,944 Ahh. (can clatters) 215 00:09:55,945 --> 00:09:58,047 (belches) 216 00:09:58,048 --> 00:10:01,083 Uh, n-no, sh-she doesn't like your son. Eyes up here, buddy. 217 00:10:01,084 --> 00:10:03,852 What? I don't see you buying me a drink. Eyes up here. 218 00:10:03,853 --> 00:10:06,822 My eyes are up here. I see what's going on. 219 00:10:06,823 --> 00:10:08,891 That tiny wife of yours freezin' you out? 220 00:10:08,892 --> 00:10:10,926 Thought you'd come sniffing around 221 00:10:10,927 --> 00:10:13,929 'cause you heard bill left? What? No! I just want my boom box, 222 00:10:13,930 --> 00:10:16,932 And I want you to control your dog. It's not my dog. It's bill's dog. 223 00:10:16,933 --> 00:10:19,835 You got a problem with the dog, you gotta take it up with him. Fine. Then where's bill? 224 00:10:19,836 --> 00:10:21,770 Beats me. We had a fight. 225 00:10:21,771 --> 00:10:24,473 I stabbed him in the ass with a fork. 226 00:10:24,474 --> 00:10:26,975 I haven't seen him since. Eyes up here. 227 00:10:28,976 --> 00:10:32,946 Mom, I'm going out. What are you telling me for? 228 00:10:32,947 --> 00:10:34,981 Rodney, I want to talk to you. 229 00:10:34,982 --> 00:10:38,952 Hey! Wait a minute. Get away fm my boy. 230 00:10:38,953 --> 00:10:41,054 I'm caught. I'm-- 231 00:10:41,055 --> 00:10:42,389 (snap) 232 00:10:42,390 --> 00:10:44,524 (grunts) (gasps) 233 00:10:44,525 --> 00:10:47,394 Oh, my god. I am so sorry. 234 00:10:47,395 --> 00:10:49,596 Really. That was-- that was an accident. 235 00:10:51,265 --> 00:10:54,000 You gonna put that away? 236 00:11:02,488 --> 00:11:00,155 How'd it go? 237 00:11:03,156 --> 00:11:04,723 Not how I thought. 238 00:11:04,724 --> 00:11:07,059 Wha-- 239 00:11:07,060 --> 00:11:09,295 What do you mean? Where's the boom box? 240 00:11:09,296 --> 00:11:11,263 Did you talk about the dog? 241 00:11:11,264 --> 00:11:12,631 I think so. 242 00:11:12,632 --> 00:11:15,901 I'm pretty sure I did, before... It came out. 243 00:11:15,902 --> 00:11:17,403 It? What's "it"? 244 00:11:17,404 --> 00:11:20,639 She was wearing this bra-- you saw her bra? 245 00:11:20,640 --> 00:11:22,641 Frankie, my eyes were up here, 246 00:11:22,642 --> 00:11:24,677 I swear, and, I mean, I saw things peripherally, 247 00:11:24,678 --> 00:11:26,745 But that's, you know, the way god made eyes. 248 00:11:26,746 --> 00:11:28,714 If you're gonna get mad at anybody, 249 00:11:28,715 --> 00:11:32,318 Blame god for makingeripheral vision. What are you talking about? 250 00:11:32,319 --> 00:11:34,620 Her boob... Popped out, sorta. 251 00:11:34,621 --> 00:11:36,789 Okay? How did that happen? 252 00:11:36,790 --> 00:11:39,225 Boobs just don't pop out on their own. 253 00:11:39,226 --> 00:11:41,260 I don't--I don't know. I-I was, uh, I was-- 254 00:11:41,261 --> 00:11:42,962 I was reaching... Or--or pulling... 255 00:11:42,963 --> 00:11:46,198 I don't know. It all happened so fast. What is this? 256 00:11:46,199 --> 00:11:47,666 I-I don't know. 257 00:11:47,667 --> 00:11:50,069 There's a whole chunk that I don't remember. 258 00:11:50,070 --> 00:11:52,071 I remember I was trying to stop rodney. 259 00:11:52,072 --> 00:11:55,441 Her son was there? Yeah, and he didn't seem all that shocked to see it, 260 00:11:55,442 --> 00:11:57,576 So... Who knows what that means. (sighs) 261 00:11:57,577 --> 00:12:00,546 Anyway, I just got the hell out of there. Oh, my god, mike. Oh, myod! 262 00:12:00,547 --> 00:12:03,349 I've spent the last 12 years trying to keep the peace, 263 00:12:03,350 --> 00:12:05,384 And yoblow it all in 15 minutes. 264 00:12:05,385 --> 00:12:07,386 We're dead, mike. We're all dead. 265 00:12:07,387 --> 00:12:09,822 (gasps) someone's in the window. 266 00:12:09,823 --> 00:12:11,357 It's your reflection. 267 00:12:11,358 --> 00:12:13,792 Yeah, this time. 268 00:12:13,793 --> 00:12:15,794 I finished your book report. 269 00:12:15,795 --> 00:12:17,830 Cool. Where is it? 270 00:12:17,831 --> 00:12:19,798 In a safe place. You'll get it 271 00:12:19,799 --> 00:12:22,134 When you teach me how to kick a ball. 272 00:12:22,135 --> 00:12:25,204 (crunching) nicely played, little man. 273 00:12:25,205 --> 00:12:27,172 Nicely played. 274 00:12:29,376 --> 00:12:31,577 Dude... (sighs) come on. Kicking a ball is, like, 275 00:12:31,578 --> 00:12:33,512 The easiest thing in the world. It's this. 276 00:12:33,513 --> 00:12:36,382 Then why can't I do it? 277 00:12:36,383 --> 00:12:37,850 I don't know. 278 00:12:37,851 --> 00:12:40,286 You miss every time you look at the ball. 279 00:12:40,287 --> 00:12:43,055 Maybe you should just close your eyes and kick. Okay. 280 00:12:44,791 --> 00:12:46,492 (sighs) 281 00:12:47,928 --> 00:12:49,695 (thump) whoa! 282 00:12:49,696 --> 00:12:51,997 I did it! I kicked the ball! 283 00:12:51,998 --> 00:12:53,666 I know! That was awesome. 284 00:12:53,667 --> 00:12:55,668 You were like a jedi knight or something. 285 00:12:55,669 --> 00:12:58,270 That was the coolest thing I've ever seen. 286 00:12:58,271 --> 00:12:59,805 (laughs) come on. 287 00:12:59,806 --> 00:13:02,875 Spending time that day with axl was one of the greatest moments 288 00:13:02,876 --> 00:13:05,811 In brick's young life. In fact, it was so great 289 00:13:05,812 --> 00:13:07,780 That brick didn't want it to end. 290 00:13:07,781 --> 00:13:10,849 All right. You kicked a ball. Now where's my report? 291 00:13:10,850 --> 00:13:14,286 I even misspelled "harpoon" so she'll think you wrote it. 292 00:13:14,287 --> 00:13:16,388 Wait a minute. Where's the rest? 293 00:13:16,389 --> 00:13:18,958 This is supposed to be, like, 20 pages. 294 00:13:18,959 --> 00:13:21,627 It was fun when you taught me how to kick a ball, 295 00:13:21,628 --> 00:13:24,363 So every time you're nice and play with me, 296 00:13:24,364 --> 00:13:27,399 You get another page. What? That wasn't the deal. 297 00:13:27,400 --> 00:13:30,135 Feel free to read the book and do the report yourself. Okay, fine. 298 00:13:30,136 --> 00:13:31,603 (sighs) 299 00:13:31,604 --> 00:13:34,473 How about a sandwich? Do you want a sandwich? 300 00:13:34,474 --> 00:13:36,508 Peanut butter, no crust. 301 00:13:36,509 --> 00:13:38,410 So for the next few days, 302 00:13:38,411 --> 00:13:42,848 Axl was paid, page by page, to be nice to his brother. 303 00:13:52,492 --> 00:13:54,460 (clicks remote) no, not again. 304 00:13:54,461 --> 00:13:57,363 We just watched "charlie brown" for, like, the seventh time! 305 00:13:57,364 --> 00:13:59,098 Yeah, but this time we're gonna mute the sound 306 00:13:59,099 --> 00:14:01,033 And act out the parts ourselves. 307 00:14:01,034 --> 00:14:03,035 I'm gonna need two pages for that. 308 00:14:03,036 --> 00:14:05,437 Deal. I would've given you three. 309 00:14:05,438 --> 00:14:07,406 Days had gone by, and so far, 310 00:14:07,407 --> 00:14:09,441 No retaliation for the boob incident. 311 00:14:09,442 --> 00:14:11,410 I was scared to leave my house unattended, 312 00:14:11,411 --> 00:14:14,279 But frugal hoosier had a sale on iowa white chablis, 313 00:14:14,280 --> 00:14:15,881 And I was tense. 314 00:14:15,882 --> 00:14:17,850 Okay, mom. I got the last three boxes. 315 00:14:17,851 --> 00:14:19,785 (sighs) great. Throw 'em in. 316 00:14:19,786 --> 00:14:21,854 Good. Okay, come on. Let's go. 317 00:14:21,855 --> 00:14:24,189 Wait, wait! All we have is wine and sherbet. 318 00:14:24,190 --> 00:14:26,225 Yeah, we're good. 319 00:14:29,662 --> 00:14:31,163 Oh, my god. 320 00:14:31,164 --> 00:14:32,598 (whispers) there she is. 321 00:14:32,599 --> 00:14:34,633 (normal voice) quick. Duck down before she sees us. 322 00:14:38,004 --> 00:14:40,906 Mom, how long do we have to stay like this? 323 00:14:40,907 --> 00:14:43,308 Until they leave the store... And drive away... 324 00:14:43,309 --> 00:14:46,145 And then we have to count to a hundred. 325 00:14:46,146 --> 00:14:48,180 (cart rattling) oh! Um, excuse me. They're not-- 326 00:14:48,181 --> 00:14:51,550 They're not allowed to do that. Hey! You heard what the lady said. 327 00:14:51,551 --> 00:14:54,820 Stop that or she'll punch you. Oh, no! That's-- that's not what I meant. 328 00:14:54,821 --> 00:14:58,390 Mom, how do some people get so mean? 329 00:14:58,391 --> 00:14:59,858 I don't know. 330 00:14:59,859 --> 00:15:01,860 Her first husband was a meth addict 331 00:15:01,861 --> 00:15:03,662 Who left her for a highchool girl. 332 00:15:03,663 --> 00:15:05,564 And then she was with that dave guy. 333 00:15:05,565 --> 00:15:07,566 I don't know what he did, 334 00:15:07,567 --> 00:15:09,468 But he kept really weird hours. 335 00:15:09,469 --> 00:15:11,336 And I think she worked at the nursing home 336 00:15:11,337 --> 00:15:13,205 Where they had that shoot-out. 337 00:15:13,206 --> 00:15:16,608 (sighs) she's had a pretty tough life, I guess. 338 00:15:16,609 --> 00:15:18,043 Stop that! Ohh. 339 00:15:18,044 --> 00:15:20,012 Wade, let go of your brother's ear! 340 00:15:20,013 --> 00:15:21,914 So help me god, I told you! 341 00:15:21,915 --> 00:15:24,583 You'd better stop that right now! (sighs) 342 00:15:24,584 --> 00:15:26,885 Suddenly, it was like I was seeing rita glossner 343 00:15:26,886 --> 00:15:28,720 For the first time. 344 00:15:28,721 --> 00:15:30,923 Th-that'll be $148. 345 00:15:30,924 --> 00:15:32,624 Oh. Uh... 346 00:15:32,625 --> 00:15:35,060 Well, I-I don't have that much money. I'll-- 347 00:15:35,061 --> 00:15:37,262 Derrick, stop shaking that soda! 348 00:15:37,263 --> 00:15:40,466 I guess I'll just have to put some things back. 349 00:15:43,603 --> 00:15:46,505 Maybe rita wasn't scary after all. 350 00:15:46,506 --> 00:15:48,474 Maybe she wasn't even mean. 351 00:15:48,475 --> 00:15:50,042 Maybe she was just 352 00:15:50,043 --> 00:15:53,312 A tired, stressed-out, overwhelmed mom like me. 353 00:15:57,217 --> 00:15:58,750 Yeah? 354 00:15:58,751 --> 00:16:00,619 Hi. Hi, rita. 355 00:16:00,620 --> 00:16:03,155 I just wanted to stop by and, um... 356 00:16:03,156 --> 00:16:05,190 Well, if you look in here, 357 00:16:05,191 --> 00:16:07,993 I think you might find a few items you'd like. 358 00:16:13,666 --> 00:16:15,968 (knocks on door) 359 00:16:19,072 --> 00:16:21,840 There is no need to thank me for the food. 360 00:16:21,841 --> 00:16:23,375 I'm just being neighborly. 361 00:16:23,376 --> 00:16:25,244 'cause that's what neighrs do-- 362 00:16:25,245 --> 00:16:26,845 Help each other. 363 00:16:26,846 --> 00:16:28,747 (crunches) okay. 364 00:16:31,551 --> 00:16:32,951 (sighs) 365 00:16:37,223 --> 00:16:39,158 (chuckles) you're probably a little embarrassed, 366 00:16:39,159 --> 00:16:40,959 But don't be. 367 00:16:40,960 --> 00:16:43,228 I'm just reaching out here, 368 00:16:43,229 --> 00:16:46,165 Trying to get to know you, you know. A-and please, 369 00:16:46,166 --> 00:16:49,001 What I did certainly doesn't require a "thank you." 370 00:16:49,002 --> 00:16:50,569 (laughs) 371 00:16:50,570 --> 00:16:52,237 Good. 372 00:16:56,809 --> 00:16:58,277 What? 373 00:16:58,278 --> 00:17:00,279 Actually, it does require a "thank you." 374 00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:02,281 I don't have a lot of money, 375 00:17:02,282 --> 00:17:03,982 And I bought you all those groceries, so-- 376 00:17:03,983 --> 00:17:06,885 Look, if you want to go around giving people food 377 00:17:06,886 --> 00:17:08,921 So you can feel high-an d-mighty about yourself, fine. 378 00:17:08,922 --> 00:17:10,989 But don't expect me to kiss your behind. 379 00:17:10,990 --> 00:17:13,959 Hey, I'm reaching out here, trying to be a good neighbor. 380 00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:15,427 All I want-- 381 00:17:15,428 --> 00:17:16,929 (laughs) there it is. 382 00:17:16,930 --> 00:17:19,364 I knew you came here wantin' something, 383 00:17:19,365 --> 00:17:22,067 Just like that hands-y husband of yours. 384 00:17:22,068 --> 00:17:23,735 That was an accident. 385 00:17:23,736 --> 00:17:25,704 What do you want? 386 00:17:25,705 --> 00:17:27,372 I'll tell you what I want. 387 00:17:27,373 --> 00:17:30,275 I want my kids to be able to play in the front yard 388 00:17:30,276 --> 00:17:32,311 Without having to run from your psycho dog! 389 00:17:32,312 --> 00:17:34,313 I want to be able to plant shrubs 390 00:17:34,314 --> 00:17:37,216 Knowing they aren't gonna be yanked out of the ground! 391 00:17:37,217 --> 00:17:39,151 I finally want to put a damn pumpkin out 392 00:17:39,152 --> 00:17:41,753 And know it's actually gonna make it to hloween. 393 00:17:41,754 --> 00:17:44,056 Hey! I came over here 394 00:17:44,057 --> 00:17:46,258 Hoping that we had more similarities than differences, 395 00:17:46,259 --> 00:17:48,327 But you know what? We don't. 396 00:17:48,328 --> 00:17:50,329 Oh, so you think you're better than me? 397 00:17:50,330 --> 00:17:52,464 You haven't set the bar very high. 398 00:17:52,465 --> 00:17:54,266 The whole neighborhood is better than you! 399 00:17:54,267 --> 00:17:55,867 And you know why? 400 00:17:55,868 --> 00:17:57,736 Because we don't let our kids blow up mailboxes 401 00:17:57,737 --> 00:18:01,006 Or beat people up or steal. My boys don't do that. 402 00:18:01,007 --> 00:18:03,175 Really? Look around, rita. 403 00:18:03,176 --> 00:18:05,143 None of this is yours. 404 00:18:05,144 --> 00:18:07,112 People give my boys lots of stuff. 405 00:18:07,113 --> 00:18:09,181 They're charismatic. 406 00:18:09,182 --> 00:18:11,083 They're bullies, and you're a bully, 407 00:18:11,084 --> 00:18:13,952 And we've all been too scared to do anything about it. 408 00:18:13,953 --> 00:18:16,188 But not anymore, missy! 409 00:18:16,189 --> 00:18:18,690 What do you think you're doing? 410 00:18:18,691 --> 00:18:20,993 This is the donahues' ball. Hey! Stop that. 411 00:18:20,994 --> 00:18:22,961 And these are the webers'. Hey. 412 00:18:22,962 --> 00:18:25,464 Come and get your balls, jimmy. 413 00:18:25,465 --> 00:18:28,433 (sighs) where's that damn dog when you need him? 414 00:18:28,434 --> 00:18:30,535 Razorblade! 415 00:18:30,536 --> 00:18:33,672 Come on out here, boy. We got trespassers. 416 00:18:33,673 --> 00:18:36,108 That's right. Come on! Get your stuff. 417 00:18:36,109 --> 00:18:37,943 We don't have to be afraid anymore. 418 00:18:37,944 --> 00:18:41,013 Mr. Miller, ths a rake with your name on it. 419 00:18:41,014 --> 00:18:44,283 All right, that's it. I am calling the police. 420 00:18:44,284 --> 00:18:47,052 Oh, no, you're not. 421 00:18:50,256 --> 00:18:53,091 (grunting) 422 00:18:53,092 --> 00:18:55,961 You know what? Go ahead. Call 'em! 423 00:18:55,962 --> 00:18:57,829 I'm sure they'd be very interested 424 00:18:57,830 --> 00:18:59,931 In all this stuff. 425 00:18:59,932 --> 00:19:02,167 Hey! Mrs. Leedy! 426 00:19:02,168 --> 00:19:04,469 Well, look what we have here-- 427 00:19:04,470 --> 00:19:07,439 The lawn chair you thought disappeared 428 00:19:07,440 --> 00:19:10,976 From the block party. She may have one like it, but this is mine. 429 00:19:10,977 --> 00:19:14,546 Mrs. Leedy, is this your lawn chair? I... I... (sighs) 430 00:19:14,547 --> 00:19:15,947 Mrs. Leedy, 431 00:19:15,948 --> 00:19:19,284 Is this or is this not your lawn chair? 432 00:19:19,285 --> 00:19:20,852 (panting) tell the truth 433 00:19:20,853 --> 00:19:22,921 Or lose our neighborhood forever! 434 00:19:22,922 --> 00:19:25,357 Ohh... 435 00:19:25,358 --> 00:19:26,958 Yes! 436 00:19:26,959 --> 00:19:29,528 Yes, it's my lawn chair! 437 00:19:32,799 --> 00:19:36,601 It's my neighborhood now! 438 00:19:40,973 --> 00:19:44,943 Well, I might be pregnant with a pro basketball player's kid. 439 00:19:44,944 --> 00:19:47,079 I'm gonna be out of this town soon, anyway. 440 00:19:47,080 --> 00:19:49,081 (thump) 441 00:19:54,025 --> 00:19:55,960 Yeah, uh... We got a problem. 442 00:19:56,027 --> 00:19:58,963 This report you did for me- I only got a "c," so... 443 00:19:59,030 --> 00:20:02,566 What'd you expect? I'm in second grade. 444 00:20:04,903 --> 00:20:07,938 (sighs) it was the dawn of a new day. 445 00:20:08,006 --> 00:20:10,141 Brick had conquered his fear of kicking a ball... 446 00:20:10,208 --> 00:20:12,309 And s never able to do it again. 447 00:20:13,745 --> 00:20:15,880 I made lunch! 448 00:20:15,947 --> 00:20:17,882 I'd faced my fears, too. 449 00:20:17,949 --> 00:20:20,017 And like captain ahab, I had slain my... 450 00:20:20,018 --> 00:20:22,052 , I never finished that book, either. 451 00:20:22,120 --> 00:20:24,054 Ani should ask brickb, I hhow it ends... 452 00:20:24,122 --> 00:20:26,056 But the point is, I won. 453 00:20:26,124 --> 00:20:29,627 And it kinda made me the hero of my neighborhood... 454 00:20:29,694 --> 00:20:31,095 Hey, frankie! 455 00:20:31,163 --> 00:20:33,731 You're packin' a lot of crazy 456 00:20:33,799 --> 00:20:36,300 For such a tiny little woman. 457 00:20:36,368 --> 00:20:38,369 But more importantly, 458 00:20:38,436 --> 00:20:40,237 A hero in the eyes of my own family. 459 00:20:40,305 --> 00:20:42,273 It was finally over. 460 00:20:42,340 --> 00:20:45,075 Finally, there was peace. 461 00:20:46,878 --> 00:20:48,813 How long do we gotta stay up here? 462 00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:50,414 Till mama comes back 463 00:20:50,482 --> 00:20:52,449 With the dog poop and cherry bombs. 464 00:20:53,386 --> 00:20:59,021 Sync by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com 465 00:20:59,071 --> 00:21:03,621 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0